Life is a maze

Wednesday, September 27, 2006

♥ DREAMT A LIL' DREAM OF YOU.

URGH! blogger giving me problems again.
i had wanted to upload five, five darn pictures
but our dear blogger refuses to budge. so yeah,
i settled for one, and even so it created yet more
problems. sheesh. blogger.
anyway, had wanted to blog asap, and den hop
into my bed. i've been having inadequate sleep
again... bahh.

school was pretty much a bore today.
had almost seven free periods and i spent all my
time doing, guess what? math papers. urgh.
well, at the very least, i am pushing myself to study.
soooo, that's like a good sign aye? right, coolness.

everyday, after being woken up by my dad for school,
my mind would unknowingly try to recall what i've
dreamt about the previous night.
this morning, when i got up, i dint give it much thought.
but as he strode past this morning, scenes of my dream
slowly pieced itself in my brain. now, you may have already
allowed your imaginations to run wild, but rest assured,
it's not a boy-girl relationship i am talking about here.
it's like a platonic love relationship. yeaps, he's a brother
to me. get that smacked into your brains now.
basically, i dreamt of us reconciling. and you bet that
my eyes prickled with tears that threatened to flow
if i dint hold it back as i watched his back while he slowly
sauntered towards the foyer, sooner, i could only make
out his silhouette. i miss him, i really do. we were like,
confidantes. maybe i wasnt to him, but he was by far my closest
guy friend and i took him as a real brother and wanted
to do my best in protecting or rather be there for him
when he needs. well, tables are turned now, trust betrayed.
talk about karma yeah? but what did i do to him?
i was too naive to have fully trusted and depended on him
perhaps, that i am getting bitten badly by him now.
he doesnt even give a damn i suppose. you might ask
why dint i like retaliate or defended myself with whatever
he's done to me. fact is, i had. i had defended and stood up
for myself, and i stupidly thought it was just a small
matter at first, till his rebutts came. little did i know that
with defending myself, i am instead getting myself more
hurt by him. his rebutts and allegations caught me
dumbfounded, to the point that, i've found that by keeping
mum, it would be a better choice to protect myself now.
i believe we'd both want to concentrate on our Os now.
but i just cant help feeling down about it. sure, i try to
stuff it away, into a lil' corner of my mind, however, that'd
be times whereby those memories of him sinks back into
my conscious mind. love, yes i still love him. he's been a
great brother to me, and losing a friend who's even closer
to me than my real blood-related brother is, is not
exactly a very easy thing to get over with.
fact is, i dont wanna get over it. i want to salvage it.
but, i see him giving no chance of salvation for that
wonderful relationship we shared. perhaps i should just
give up, a brother like this' not worthed? he is worthed it,
i'm telling you, he is. only, i am too frazzled already.
O God, please tell me what to do?
i miss that ck boy.

unraveled @ 10:59 PM

Tuesday, September 26, 2006

♥ JOHN TUCKER GOT ME SMITTENED.

coolness, am totally suppose to be in bed yet again.
but my itchy hands cant help but have been aching
to change my blogskin, so, TADAAA~ here it is.
all changed. again. yayness.
anyways, am gonna retire now. will edit this post tmr (:
sweet lollipop dreams. o-ya-su-mi-na-sa-i; nitey nites.

- crushing hard; john tucker? hell yeah <3

- a lifetime promise (:

unraveled @ 11:51 PM

Saturday, September 23, 2006

♥ DARN PHOTOS CANT BE UPLOADED.

firstly, i am annoyed. the pictures refuse to load.
bummer. oh well, i've been tagged.

- Single, taken or crushing?
single.

- Are you happy with your life now?
fifty fifty

- When you meet the right person,
do you fall in love with him fast?
yeah, kinda.

- Have you ever had your heart broken?
yeah, definitely.

- Do you believe there are some circumstances
where cheating love is acceptable?
NO.

- Would you take someone back if he cheats on you?
no way.

- Have you talk about marriage with another before?
kind of.

- Do you want children?
yeah! (:

- How many?
at least two (:
maximum three or four!

- Would you consider adoption?
yeaps.

- If someone likes you right now, what do you think
is the best way to let you know his feelings?
be nice to me (: hahas, well actually,
just tell me straight.
i dont really fancy beating around the bush.

- Do you enjoy getting into relationship?
yeah, it's always full of hope at start.
but often it develops into a dozen despairs.

- Be honest, what is the furthest you and your ex did?
SEX, was that what you wanted? well, too bad, we dint (:

- Do you believe in love at first sight?
beginning not to.

- Are you romantic?
i'd say, quite.

- Do you believe you can change someone?
yeaps.

- If you could get married somewhere,
where would it be?
i'd like to hold it at some outdoor place,
but then being a christian, the dream's to
get married ina very nice peaceful looking church (:

- Do you easily give in when you are fighting?
it varies.

- Do you have feelings for someone right now?
yeaps, still do.

- Have you ever broken a heart?
uh-huh.

- If one day your best friend falls in love with
the guy you deeply in love with, what would you do?
let him choose then. i dont believe in retreating but
whatever the guy's decision is, i would be prepared for it.

- Are you missing someone now?
yeah, guess who? hahas.
----------
so there, i am resorted to doing quizes for today then.

You Are From Neptune

You are dreamy and mystical, with a natural psychic ability.You love music, poetry, dance, and (most of all) the open sea.Your soul is filled with possibilities, and your heart overflows with compassion.You can be in a room full of friendly people and feel all alone.If you don't get carried away with one idea, your spiritual nature will see you through anything.

What Planet Are You From?

You Are 70% Psychic

You are pretty psychic.While you aren't Miss Cleo, you've got a little ESP going on.And although you're sometimes off on your predictions...You're more often right than wrongSo go with your instincts - you know more than you think

Are You Psychic?

Your Celebrity Baby Name Is...

Raine Diva

What's" Your Celebrity Baby Name?

You Are Grape

You are bold and a true individual. You are very different and very okay with that.People know you as a straight shooter. You're very honest, even when the truth hurts.You are also very grounded and practical. No one is going to sneak anything by you.People enjoy your fresh approach to life. And it's this honesty that makes you a very innovative person.

What Color Purple Are You?

You Are 84% Pure

You're so innocent, it's almost like you're not human.Taking this test is probably the naughtiest thing you've done in a while!

How Pure Are You?

You Are 12% Shy

You aren't shy at all, in fact, you're probably quite outgoing.You are comfortable in almost any social situation, no matter how difficult.

How Shy Are You?

What Your Bathroom Habits Say About You

You are very independent and self-centered. You don't solve other people's problems - and you don't expect them to solve yours.
You spend a lot on clothes, and you tend to be a very dresser. However, it's hard for you to throw away trendy clothes when they go out of style.
You have the perfect blend of confidence and class. You're proud of who you are - but you don't broadcast it.
In relationships, you tend to be very romantic and demanding. You'll treat your partner like gold, but you expect a lot in return.

What Do Your Bathroom Habits Say About You?

Your Learning Style: Enthusiastic and Imaginative

You are always up for an intellectual challenge - in fact, hard subjects are actually easiest for you.
You Should Study:
AdvertisingAstronomyBiologyChemistryFinance JournalismMarketingPhysics

What Should You Study?

Your Personality Cluster is Extraverted Intuition

You are:
A true wordsmith - a master of wordsOriginal, spontaneous, and a true inspirationHighly energetic, up for any challengeEntertaining and engaging, both to friends and strangers

What's" Your Personality Cluster?

If You Were Born in 2893...

Your Name Would Be: Kad Enm
And You Would Be: The Future's Last Hope

If You Were Born in 2893

You Are a Capitalist Republican

Money makes your world go round - and it's no surprise that you always vote your wallet.You're financially successful (or plan to be), and your agenda is low tax and pro business.You don't get fired up about abortion... but mention capital gains tax, and you go crazy.You want government to be as small as possible - and to stay out of the way of business.

What's" Your Political Persuasion?

Your Chances of Being a Multimillionaire: 80%

You have a good chance of being a multimillionaire. Better than most people.You simply have a natural knack for money and the personality for success.

Will You Be a Multimillionaire?

You've Changed 68% in 10 Years

Compared to who you were ten years ago, you've changed a great deal.In fact, you're probably in a completely different phase of your life - and very happy about it!

How Much Have You Changed in 10 Years?

yayness. alright, my eyes are like going blur
from taking all these quizes already (:
well i think i'd better get sleeping soon.
tanning at pasir ris tomorrow. coolness.
i am so gonna be studying as i tan. i will! hahas.

yeah, sch was like... awesome today.
was being lame as usual. thinking of different names
of objects or people into "hokkein" phrases. lols.
totally hilarious. it sorta like started when i randomly
asked dearest pru,
"do you know what is kua-le-ai-te (look at your pig) ?"
which of course she dint. thus she burst into tons
of laughter, so did i, when i told her what it was.

kua-le-ai-te = cal-cu-la-tor. calculator!
muahahas. dint know that did'ya?! hahas.
and so the list went on. with both of us coming up
with more and more lame "hokkein" phrases and then
asking clarence and marcus to guess. lols. i'm soooo
gona miss these moments after i leave sec4....
i'll miss the people and all but not the school. oops =X

AAAAH! next friday's graduation ceremony!!!
goodness. needa go up stage shake hands and all.
we'll all start getting emo. i will remember to grab along
my camera to school that day! i need pictures taken.
i can and shall never stop being a cam-whore! ciao`

love.

unraveled @ 12:00 AM

Tuesday, September 19, 2006

♥ FORBIDDEN CITY (:

FORBIDDEN CITY:
THE POTRAIT OF AN EMPRESS.

coolness. the play was AWESOME.
goodness, i can like watch it over and over and
over and over and over... you get what i mean.
yeah, thank goodness i bought the cd, and now
i can listen to it whenever i want, so that i wont miss
the play so much. hahas. the next time it's gonna
be staged again, hell yeah you can bet that i'm gonna
watch it again. i'll talk about the synopsis of the
show another time, i've gotta go do coursework
after this. hahas.

- kristle and ME; pretty pretty ladies <3

- chelsie and ME; sister sister (:

- ME; and of course i was cam-whoring
before going out (:

there's still more pictures of cam-whoring.
will post another day (:
coolness. i love the play i love the play
i love the play. lols. mrs danapal looked so
pretty (: nope i dint in any way get scolded
by her. hahas. saw some other teachers too.

well, after the play, kristle and i walked to
raffles city and had some coffee there (:
that was already bout 11? yeah.
and thankfully i got a lift home ytd (:
my feet were aching like mad. heels.
urgh. it's still not seasoned. lalala`

oh regarding the retarded guy i was talkin'
about on my tagboard, hahas.
well, that day renu and i were studying
at delifrance in hougang mall, and suddenly
there was this guy that was standing outside the
glass just right beside us. so we thought he was
just like staring at the delifrance poster, lil' did
we know, he knocked on the glass, looked at me
and pointed to a paper pad that he was holding,
it read "can i have your number please!"
lols. i was quite shocked. anyway, he looked
kinda dumb, so i refused, but he just kept insisting.
gosh. both renu and i were like laughing.
he was quite persistant. when i looked away,
he knocked on the glass again to get my attention.
he just doesnt get the meaning does he?
hahas. no in the end i did not give him my number.

alrighy, i needa go do coursework ):
bahh. I LOVE FORBIDDEN CITY:
THE POTRAIT OF AN EMPRESS.
yayness.

unraveled @ 4:21 PM

Saturday, September 16, 2006

♥ IT FINALLY ENDED; SORRY BABY.

PRELIMINARY EXAMINATIONS OVER!

yeah. and so i chilled out over at pru's yesterday.
and like randomly, she offered me wine instead
of water or some fizzy drink. hahas. oh well,
can i also have a burbon coke the next time round?
hahas. geez. did i tell you what pru plays with at
home?! you can never guess.

- TADAAA~ the doll's named marisa :D

- wine wine *yums.

anyhow, i sure hope that i'd be able to go for the
frist three months jc with my prelims results.
but hard to say. first time in such a long time
i'm studying. argh. now that prelims are over,
no no i wont be playing all day long again. gonna
continue studying, tuition and all. i have a dream
to achieve. it's either jc, poly, or overseas.
well, wish me luck peeps (:

and yeah. well, it just ended today. mutual agreement.
eight months plus, all in all. i will cherish the happy
memories. i hope you would too. thanks for the many
things you've done for me. and i'm really sorry.
you're the one that i've loved most and you'll always
be someone special to me. take care baby.

alas! i'm indeed gonna be going to watch this play!!!
yayness. watching it with kristle (:
i cant wait!!! monday night it'll be. coolness.

okie dokes. am signing off to go watch my
church service online <3

unraveled @ 4:55 PM

Monday, September 11, 2006

♥ SEPTEMBER 11TH.

well, it was only when pru asked me for the date
today that i'd realised it's indeed september 11.
five years down after the crashing of the twin towers.
personally, i think that we should commemorate this
day. where thousands of people lost their lives,
five years ago on this fateful day.
the crashing of the twin towers and
bombing of the pentagon. it now seems so vague.
i dint even know that it's already the fifth anniversary
until fifteen minutes ago. yeaps. it's definitely a lesson
learnt and serves as a reminder for us not to take
peace and safety for granted. terrorism's just that far
away.
kinda weird that whoever it was, even hijacked PSLE
papers in malaysia. like what for? i'm clueless.
well, anyway i'm off. study. ADDMATH tmr. argh!!!
had insufficient time for both geog and emath paper
two today. or maybe it was just my time management.
math looks alright. i hope and think and wish i can pass.
hahas. alright. take care folks (:
why not just take a minute to commemorate 911? (:

unraveled @ 10:13 PM

Sunday, September 10, 2006

♥ RETRO MAMA`

- narcissism =D

- mother mother in the middle. heh.

- every cloud has its silver lining (:

- they say she's my sister. tell me where do
we look alike again? me.nancy. (:

GOD's beloved children <3

hah. at last, i went back to church yesterday (:
but only yesterday though. i'd still have to complete
with O levels first before i can go for weekly services.
right. am now taking an interlude from studying.
tomorrow's papers are my geog elective and
emath paper 2. hadn't really been working very
hard during this hols. sigh. i guess i shall work
extra hard during next whole week of exams then.

well, talked with some cell members and cell leader
after service yesterday, dwelled at expo all the way
till 11pm. and we all nearly missed the last train
from expo to tanah merah. hahas. took a cab home
from serangoon. midnight charge! argh. it was already
12.15 (i think) when i got out at serangoon station.
although there were still bus services, i was too lazy to
take a bus home. hahas. still needa walk in for approx.
10mins! and it's so dark there. so yeah, cab's safer.
valid reason. lols.

anyway, folks, i might be shifting outta this serangoon
north region. hopefully! well, i'm not supposed to know
anything bout it. but i've got reliable sources. hahas.
i shall blog about that when it's really finalized (:
it's gonna be fun. right kristle? hahas.
i'm already anticipating christmas.
spent some time at kris' this hols. how nice it was to back
at hougang ave 6. i miss that place so much.
i remembered that time when i was just living on the
sixth storey and kris' is still living on the second storey.
dropping by each others' houses was just a matter of
3 minutes? nice wasn't it (:
i still miss that previous house of mine. where there
was so much adequate space for me and my then puppy
to run about. ruffles is also gone. no, he's not dead, given away.
mum and dad gave him away. i miss ruffles. my potato chips.
hahas. i miss mummy and uncle fred (kris' dad) playing "tai di"
on the first floor of my flat while kristle and i just fooled
about upstairs. hahas. when daddy and uncle fred went
for a game of billard at the superbowl, kris and i could
just spend a night of endless talking in her room.
memories. it'd be nice if we could rewind it (:

i should return to the stack of geography notes
waiting patiently for me. a terrible headache now aint
helping. someone save me.
argh. stop complaining gwen! STUDY.
hahas. toodles (:

unraveled @ 5:29 PM

Friday, September 08, 2006

♥ STUDYING AFTER BLOGGING! (:

FORBIDDEN CITY :
POTRAIT OF THE EMPRESS.

oh my goodness. i cant believe that i am letting
this terrific play watch me by.... sobs.
giving up on the chance to watch this play again
for my studies. urgh. it'd better pay off i hope.
this wonderful play opens today. it's a great great
great stage play. i watched it once when i was
thirteen. memorable it is. anyhow, those of you
who are pretty free can try ta catch this play.
you wont regret. but tickets are selling fast though.
it's about... the legendary empress dowager cixi.
don't worry, the whole play's in english.
starring kit chan. there's hossan leong too (:

lunch at thai express yesterday (:
yums. was there with renuka, her friend and bavani.
hahas. bavani was raving about we wasting time
and rushing us off to study. and guess what.. she's
only a sec three and she's sensible enough to mug
hard now, and here i am blogging. oh gosh.

stayed over at kristle's house again yesterday.
and my manicure was done by her (:
oh and pedicure too. not full mani and pedi
though. howvere, yayness (: THANK YOU.
going over tomorrow again. to STUDY.

she took a shot of my back view from where
she was lying (:
so this is how i look from behind. hahas. oooh,
my hair's growing~~~ long long long! i want
it long~ (:

another one of my vain pot photos as i was
cam-whoring just the other day =x
alright, i'll go have a shower and then mug for
stupid geography. if only mr bay was still our
geog teacher ): sobs.
havent really been mugging. sheesh.
wish me luck.

`RETRO ROOM IT'LL BE!

unraveled @ 3:11 PM

Wednesday, September 06, 2006

♥ CAM-WHORE

that's my attempt in forging pru's signature.
the one on the top is my forgery while the one
below's pru's signature. i know it's not totally alike,
but i'm working on it (:
muahahas. pru, you can do my star` lols.

- my mocha villa.

had it today again (: yums. or rather,
yesterday, 5th sept.

- outfitter girls.

bought this shirt! i am happy happy happy (:

- cam whoring.
there's sth wrong with my cam.
blurry. ):

had the mood to camwhore just now.
therefore ppl, you're only viewing one of the many
pictures that i've taken of myself not too long ago
only (: going out to study again later.
been sleeping late these few days. had better adjust
my life clock back again. i need my beauty sleep. hahas.

well, many of you might have already gotten news
on the death of steve irwin, i feel that it's such a huge pity ):
i remembere i used to always watch his shows on cable.
he's was just... such a nice guy. and being killed by a
bloody stingray... it's like so unjustified. if he were to be killed
by a croc instead, it'll be like somehow what we were
initially already prepared for, he's called the croc hunter.
killed by a stingray barb, ridiculous. it hadnt really sunk
into me yet.
a stingray's barb, approximately 10 inches long killed him
when it pierced through from under his rib cage and right into
his heart. he was said to might have died instantly.
some may not see why this big fuss about his death, but
somehow i feel, although we only see him through the
telly, he has somewhat a very special place in our hearts and
his onscreen telecasts somehow seemed larger than life.
a big loss indeed. he died doing what he love
however, he has earned my utmost respect.
may god bless him in heaven and
his wife and kids on earth (:
steve irwin, you'll be remembered.

gosh. i am hungry again! sheesh.
anyways, i am done with blogging. going off.
baby went off for coral island... coming back only on saturday
morning... urgh. i miss you.

unraveled @ 2:06 AM

Tuesday, September 05, 2006

♥ I SHOULD BE ASLP.

i should terribly be asleep now. math class at 8am!
goodness. then again, i'm conferencing with kamy,
carmen and wei hao and we're helping carmen with
some life problems. so... i can sleep later :D smile.

well, these are the rest of the neoprints kamy, car and
i took together on teacher's day (:
(thanks pru for helping me scan! :)) )

hmms... the world is a small small place~~~
nigel and i actually "met" on the train. hahas.
fact is that, both of us have never met each other
face to face before. we were in the same cabin, however
we werent sure if that was really us. hahas.
nigel's a model model. pretty nice guy (:

studying at mos burger failed today.
tried to do my relative velocity, cant really recall what
mr yeo-yeo had taught, therefore couldnt really
get the correct answers... and since ben, my tutor,
gave up on relative velocity so he cant teach me.... wth.
then shortly after started studying... carcar had some
*probs so we got outta shaw house to talk talk.
aiyoh, so many things happened. dint get tuition today,
dint really study today... argh. watsed another day ):
sigh... prelims prelims prelims. URGH.

boo. alright. gonna go lie on my bed and continue the
conference (:
OH. my brother is SOOOOO annoying!
when he wants to use the house phone, i gotta hang up.
scold me for not opening the window, he oso never open what!?
and so i said "raining what!" he opened the window
"no rain already what!" HOW i know?!
urgh.... so annoying. thirty-years old very big ar?!
( #*$&@*#$#&&!^@!!@&^^%@##^$ )
*ahhhhh` okay. done (:

yayness. alright. going offline :D
toodles`

unraveled @ 1:17 AM

Saturday, September 02, 2006

♥ YAWNS.

uh huh. time for updates (:
am feeling really sleepy already. so am jumping
right into my bed after this, okay maybe not jump.

yeaps, got some retail therapy today. oh my gosh.
it felt so good` can you imagine the glee when i bought
earrings and a top? oh but parting with the money is
another story. lols. well anway, had lunch at cafe cartel
today. had a delicious meal (:
gwenie's recommandation of the day:
cafe cartel's panfried linguine. *yums :b

proceeded to tcc after that. tried to do some mathematics,
but i ended up chatting with kamy and carmen, again.
hahas. oh! another one,
gwenie's recommandation of the day:
tcc's mocha villa (:

nth much today actually.

-- updates --
monday, 28aug.

PRACTICALS. i had three darn practicals.
dammit. not enough time to completely finish
both chem and physics prac... boo ):
had fun though!
f&n cwa prac was coool~ you could see everyone
in chaos in the kitchen that day. lols. especially gaya,
she used two work tables and messed up her whole
floor area. tsk tsk, gaya, cause the cleaner to have a
hard time only. but i LOVE your sambal!

- my typical chinese meal.
rice, prawn omelette, soy sauce chicken and cabbage soup.

- my soy sauce chicken. yums? (:

looks simple aye? we have to come up stupid stories
explaining why we're cooking what we're cooking
alright! sheesh. i'm a c.h.e.f. lalala`

29 aug, tuesday.
english papers. i hope i did well.
keeping my fingers crossed.

- @ delifrance.
mugging with renuka~ radiocar :D

30 aug, wednesday.

- "mugging" @ gelare.
aint that all superb i thought it'd be.

dint attend school on thursday. persuaded daddy to allow
me not to. well, sch had ACES day... so yeah, PON.
besides, pru, gaya, renu and suba all not going that day...
why would i've gone either? hahas.
by the way, less than half the class turned up. lols (:

went back to my primary school, xinghua primary.
sadly not many of the 6AAs came back.
eldora, daniel, xiao fang and jenny. so pathetic.
it's like our last year going back there, considering we'd
be going back to our secondary schools instead.
had lotsa fun anyway. jenny's so adorable!!! omg.
eldora and i kept making fun of her. lols. poor jenny.
i'll miss those wonderful moments with 5AA/6AA.
i miss primary school days. i miss sharing stuff with doll,
miss making fun of jenny (: , miss running after the 6A1
guys to heartland mall with deemei and then having to
rush back to school for higher chinese lessons, miss having ms
ho's lessons, miss the endless crappings, miss badminton
trainings with those girls, miss recess, miss chinese orchestra
lessons, miss handbells lessons, miss "mao-mao" teacher,
miss buying pink dolphin every recess... there's so many
memoirs. and i crushed on a guy for six years, all the way
from p1-p6. lols. him too, but we were too young and shy
at that time. hahas.

anyway, i hope we'll still meet up. i dont wanna miss ya'all
for too long (:
OH. mdm lee's badminton "alumni", she had gotten
another dog! it's female and the name's Princess. mdm lee
reassured me that she's as obedient as Rufus. hahas.
so yeah, our yearly gathering at jack's place and then to mdm
lee's house again. dont forget girls. CHRISTMAS. cant wait (:

alright. i think today's post's like too lengthy?
it's already 3.34am, i'm getting hungry...
therefore i shall go to bed, dont wanna snack now,
i'll grow fat! lols.
till then, ciaos...

unraveled @ 3:08 AM